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Thursday, February 23, 2012

Love Never Stops Believing



The diminutive house was simple but tolerable.  It consisted of one large room on a rutted and dusty street.  Its red tin roof was one of many in this poor neighborhood on the outskirts of the obscure Brazilian village.  It was nondescript but a passable home.  Maria and her daughter Christina had done what they could to add color to the grey walls and warmth to the inflexible dirt floor: an old calendar, a wooden crucifix, a faded photograph of a family patriarch.  The furnishings were unpretentious: a single bed on each side of the room, an artless washbasin, and an unfashionable wood-burning stove.

Maria's husband had died when Christina was an infant.  The widowed mother, stubbornly refusing opportunity to remarry, found employment and set out to raise her young daughter alone.  And now, fifteen years later, the most difficult days and times had passed.  Though Maria's salary as a maid afforded no luxuries, it was reliable and provided life's necessities.  Now Christina had reached the age where she could work and contribute to the family finances.

Christina was a free spirited young lady.  Some say she got her independence from her mother.  More than likely it was the combination of her mother's self-sufficiency and the absence of a father figure in her life.  She cringed at the cultural view and traditional idea of marrying young and raising a family.  And this was not because she had no suitors, for she had her pick of men.  Her curvaceous figure, shimmering olive skin, and riveting brown eyes kept a steady stream of hopeful prospects at her door.  She possessed the rare magic some women have that causes men to become entranced, reeling them into a captive spell, sending their heads turning, their minds spinning, their thoughts wandering, their hearts racing.  But it was her spirited curiosity and idealist hopes that pushed the idea of marriage and family away.  She longed for something bigger and better, something vibrant and exciting, a place where dreams are discovered, where life is more than subsistence.

Christina spoke frequently of moving to the city.  She visualized trading her dirt floor and impoverished barrio for the paved roads and bright lights, for the nascent excitement of the mystical shining city sitting on the sapphire water's edge, rimmed with lush green mountains, protected by Jesus towering high above.  Just the thought of this horrified her mother.  Maria was always quick to remind Christina of the harshness of the city, "People do not know you there.  Jobs are scarce and life is cruel.  How will you survive and what will you do for a living?"  Christina ignored and dismissed her mother's questions.  She refused to allow anything to dissuade her from pursuing her dreams.  Yet, Maria knew exactly what Christina would have to do for a living.  In a country with a sparse middle class, migrants with limited resources, inadequate skills, and no contacts are usually forced into a sordid underground world of survival.  That is why Maria's heart broke when she awoke one morning to find her daughter's bed empty and the one family suitcase missing.

Maria knew immediately where her daughter had gone.  Instantly, she knew what she needed to do.  Time was of the essence.  She quickly rifled through her drawers and threw some clothes in a bag, gathered up her life savings, and ran out of the house.  On her frantic rush to the town bus stop, she entered the local drug store to purchase one last thing she needed - pictures.  She sat in the photograph booth, closed the curtain, and spent all she could afford on images of herself.  With her purse full of black-and-white photos, she boarded the bus for Rio de Janeiro.

Maria was aware that Christina had no means to earn enough money to build a life in the city.  She also knew her daughter was too determined to give up.  When hope meets hunger, when dreams meet desperation, a person will do things once deemed unthinkable.  Knowing this, Maria began her search in areas of the city known to grant opportunities for a beautiful woman to make money fast – bars, hotels, nightclubs, casinos, burlesque halls – any place with a reputation for prostitution.  She went to them all, searching desperately for her beautiful daughter.  At each venue, she anxiously asked managers, bartenders, servers, dancers, patrons, if they had seen Christina.  Repeatedly she was met with disappointment.  So at every locale, she left her picture somewhere - taped on a bathroom mirror, pinned on a hotel bulletin board, glued to a corner phone booth, tacked in some high traffic area.  On the back of every photo was a written message.

After some days, both the money and photos ran out.  Maria was forced to go home.  With a broken heart, the shattered mother inertly returned to the bus station and boarded the bus to her penurious village.  She wept throughout the long and lonely journey home.

A few weeks later, young Christina descended the stairs of a cheap and seedy hotel clothed in a skin-tight guise that accentuated all her curves.  She looked nothing like the gorgeous young lady who had arrived in Rio filled with life and hope.  Her young face was tired.  Her laughter was suppressed.  Her innocence was lost.  Her spirit was broken.  The radiant brown eyes, once filled with vitality and vibrancy, now reflected pain and heartache.  Her dreams were dashed and her hopes were crushed.  Many nights over, she longed to trade the myriad of strange beds for the one familiar bed back home.  But she did not know how.  The shame, the disgrace, the dishonor turned her life upside down and distorted her view of a mother's love. In so many ways her home village was too far gone, too far away, to far removed from her innocent days.  Her spirit told her she could never return again.

As she reached the bottom of the stairs, she stumbled awkwardly in her vampish stilettos.  Stabilizing herself against the rail, her eyes roamed the petite lobby.  Suddenly they stopped.  She closed her eyes, rubbed them, and looked again.  Staring straight ahead, they fixated on a familiar face.  There on the lobby mirror was a small picture of her mother.  Christina's eyes moistened, her throat tightened as she rushed to the mirror and removed the small photo.  Written on the back were these words "Whatever you have done, whatever you have become, it does not matter.  Please come home."

She did.  Love was waiting.  It never stopped believing.


This is a true story originally shared by Max Lucado.  I took the liberty to rewrite a majority of the narrative in my prose.

Friday, February 17, 2012

A Hero is Gone – A Personal Tribute to Pastor Glen D. Cole


  
If death had granted him a moment to convey the sentiment, Pastor Cole would have declared his tragic and sudden passing on Valentine's Day a happy transit.  For this is how he viewed the world.  No matter how bad things appeared, how gloomy the clouds turned, he was extraordinary.  In the darkest moments of life, those times that derail and destroy most of us, he was always at his best.  He thought and lived beyond death, beyond the dark, beyond the grave.

Pastor Cole was my one and only pastor.  When God gave me a pastor, he smiled greatly and blessed my life enormously by giving me the best.  He was my mentor, my leader, my friend, and one of my life heroes.  There will never be another like him.  He had an aura about him.  He was a man who lifted everyone's spirits and lowered everyone's guard, one who accomplished so much in life.  Though it is Pastor Cole's body of achievements most will remember, it's his compassion, kindness, and giving heart I will miss.  He was the pastor, the friend, the colleague who was the first to pick up the phone and say, "I'm sorry for what happened" or "What can I do to help?"  He was the boss who was adored by his staff, so much so, they looked forward to coming to work each day and remained loyal at his side.  He was the man who sent handwritten birthday wishes, thank you cards, and encouraging notes - never losing sight of the power of personal touch.  He was the father who loved his sons, doing everything possible to bless their lives.  He was the grandfather who adored and doted on his grandchildren, making them feel special and treasured.  He was the husband who passionately loved his wife and showed us all what marriage means.

As the Pastor of my church, Glen Cole always believed in people and would see the best in them. He was a source of inspiration and hope, of courage and belief.  He gave us strength when tragedy struck, when we questioned God.  His sermons stirred the embers of our faith and reminded us of who we were, that nothing is impossible for God.  As a spiritual leader, he stood tall for us.  With God's help, he built our church, he built our school, he built our spiritual community. He built until we burst at the seams.  He was a pastor of the people, never above the people.  Every Sunday, people clamored to hear him speak, piling in for his messages as if to miss them would be to miss the rapture itself.  He always had something profound to say, something life-altering to convey, something inspiring to share, something fresh from God to transform our lives.

Pastor Cole was an amazing leader who took a personal interest in my life and the lives of his parishioners.  He truly loved people and cared for them deeply.  In my success, he was my biggest cheerleader and encourager. He is the person who paid me the highest compliment I ever received when he once introduced me at an event where I was speaking.  I will never forget the words he used and they often are a great source of hope in my immediate world and the darkness that sometimes envelops me.  In my wanderings and failures, he never focused on my personal issues.  He addressed them, then lovingly reminded me that God still had great plans for my life. "Steve, nothing can take away your calling and gifting," he would say. 
In the years I disappointed him and staggered around in a far away land, lost as a prodigal and forgotten by most, he never gave up on me nor did he forget about me.  He believed in me when I quit believing in myself.  From time to time, he sent me a note, a card, some reminder to show he cared.  Incredibly these gestures of kindness always arrived in my mailbox when they were needed most.  On one occasion I received an oversize manila envelope filled with my old writings he had saved for years.  Attached was a handwritten message that read, "I miss this great writer.  Please let him know his best days are in front of him.  God is not through with your life or wonderful gift."  I walked back inside my house with tears streaming down my face.

For me, Pastor Cole was Abraham without the doubts, Moses without the wanderings, David without the failings.  The planet has not only lost a great Christian man, it lost an honest pastor, a distinguished musician, a joyful encourager, a loving healer, a graceful reconciler, a courageous leader, a loyal friend, a devoted husband, a committed father, a dynamic preacher, a courageous leader, an inspiring visionary, and a dedicated and faithful Man of God.

Pastor, I will never forget you because I can't forget you.  To imagine a world without you is to imagine a world with a little less faith in it; a little less love in it; a little less hope in it; a little less God in it.  And this is not the kind of world where I want to live.  I will miss you more than you could ever know.  Thank you for inspiring my life, for believing in me, and for never giving up on me.  I love you with all my heart and look forward to the day when I sit with you somewhere beyond those pearly gates to tell you about the second half of my life.  Thank you for showing me the way and helping me find hope and healing again, life and love again.  Thank you for helping me find my Lord and Savior again.  Thank you for loving me in the good and the bad.

Pastor, you have gone home now, leaving us who grieve your passing with the wonderful memories you gave, the incredible good you did, the inspiring dreams you cast.  The passage of time will never completely heal the sadness of this moment.  But I will carry on as you would want me to.  I will do the best I can to emulate your amazing life, a life that demonstrated unconditional love, reflected genuine hope, and displayed astonishing faith.  Whenever I need to find you, I know where to look.  I look to where you tried to get me to look all along.  I look up.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Tender Love


A few weeks back, my friend Terry Foley shared with me a personal experience that moved me deeply.  His story demonstrated how love has its own power and is the only force capable of conquering the human heart.  As I reflect on Terry's experience, something Mother Teresa once said comes to mind, "Love to be real, it must cost, it must hurt, it must empty us of self."  In this season of love, I would like to share Terry's experience with you.  May it reaffirm in your heart that the most beautiful gift we all possess is the ability to love.  For only love can summon a response of love in our lives and in our world as the following story of Tender Love beautifully portrays.  I trust it will touch you heart in a special way.

The night came and passed and its sounds were of things a man grows accustomed to, but never trusts.  In my ignorance I lay there listening.  I held her most of the night while a blizzard blew, whiting out the room's only window.  Before drifting off, she asked me to hold her again.  Morning would soon arrive and as I lay there with her in my arms, I recalled our love story.  On this occasion, I didn't think of the bad times, only the good.  I did not want my sadness to affect her.  I would think of the bad when I was alone.  She had another love and my greatest fear was that she would shortly leave me to be with him.  But for now, she was here with me, safe in my arms and that was all that mattered.

As her head lay gently on my shoulder, I could feel her warm, irregular breathing on my neck.  After some time, she fell into a deep sleep.  I slowly removed my arms from her tender body and quietly rose from the bed.  It had been a couple of days since I changed my clothes and I wondered if I smelled.  I stumbled to one side of the room and reached down to the floor, pulled one boot on at a time, then slipped into the hallway to grab a cup of coffee.  When I returned, I sat down in a chair next to her bed and watched her.  For a long time, I stared and marveled at her indescribable beauty.  Thoughts roamed freely through my mind of all the joy she brought to my life.  I wondered, "How could a man love anyone more?"  She was beautiful, so wonderfully beautiful.  I thought back to the day I first laid my eyes upon her.  When I saw her, I was instantly filled with a passion that has not abated with time.  She arrived at a point in my life where I wanted deeper meaning in my relationships, where I wanted substance to go along with my natural exuberance for life.  All this came with my first glance of her.  From that moment on, my heart was forever hers.

Lost in my thoughts, staring silently into a reflective pool of memories, she opened her eyes, but just for a moment.  She stretched her arms toward me and I smiled and went to her.  "Hold me", she said.  Again I wrapped her tightly in my arms, never wanting to let go.  "You smell," she slowly whispered in a sleepy voice, then laughed softly and faintly.  I laughed quietly in return.  It was then she asked me the one question I feared,

"Daddy am I going to die?'
I stared into her big blue angelic eyes.
"Everyone dies, Sweetheart."

Somehow, the words comforted her as they twisted my insides.  Tears slipped from my eyes, trailed down my cheeks, and fell from my chin.  She tried her best to share her strength with me, to comfort me.  For this was my little Leigha's way.  Her first concern was always for others, especially those she loved, even as she stared death in the face.

It was several years later and twelve surgeries further, when I gave my daughter's hand to the one who would hold her in eternity.  We were alone again and I held her in my arms for the very last time.  There was a look of worry in her eyes as she stared into mine.  Experience told me, she was concerned for her mother and I. 

I pulled her close and whispered in her ear,
"Mommy and I will be fine Sweetheart." 
The break of a smile formed on her lips
"When you see Him baby, you take His hand and go with Him"

My words seemed to fill her eyes with hope.  As I gazed into them for the very last time, my fear was realized ... she left me for Him.  I felt her sweet spirit rise, leaving her pain and diseased body behind.

There has not been a day that my mind has not revisited those last minutes with my 12-year-old daughter Leigha.  Most days I go there many times over.  These days, I view that most painful moment of loss differently.  I do not see death and disease.  I do not see my frail little girl slipping away.  I now see my beautiful little angel standing in a white wedding dress, her body strong and lovely.  She is full of joy and smiling from ear to ear, holding hands with the One she loves the most.  Her Savior.  Her Healer.  Her Groom.  Now I ask you "Could a father be left with a more beautiful memory of his daughter?"

On this Valentines Day, hold those you cherish close to your heart, feel them breathe and take in their remarkable scent, and shower them with love and affection while you still have them by your side.